Have you every met those annoying couples that act like “their” relationship is so perfect that they never fight or argue about anything, ever?
Behind closed doors even the most loving of couples are likely have moments where they just reach a breaking point and snap. It doesn’t necessarily mean they are doomed as a couple or anything, but by being aware of the traps you perhaps can stop yourself from falling into some of these silly arguments.
Here are nine dumb but all-too-common fights that couples have – along with what to do about them!
#1: The gross-out arguments over bad hygiene and yucky habits.
Whether he’s farting in the bed or she’s leaving her hair all over the bathroom – just about every relationship will encounter an argument at some point over bad habits that just get on each others nerves.
These are the types of things that seem funny in hindsight but in the moment can be that last straw that sends you over the edge. And whilst these habits may be hard to shake – you should try to address them before they lead to serious tensions.
SOLUTION: Set your boundaries clearly and make sure you both respect them. If your partner has a bad habit that is getting under your skin – don’t keep quite about it – bring it up respectfully before it escalates to all-out-war.
#2: The battle for space in the home and bedroom.
This one usually doesn’t becomes apparent until you get to the whole “living together” stage of a relationship. Then suddenly arguments arise when one partner realizes just how much space the other one takes up in the bedroom, wardrobe and everywhere else in the home.
It can seem like a minor issue during the honeymoon phase of a relationship but believe us – if left unchecked – it can result it some explosive arguments further down the road.
SOLUTION: Create separate spaces if needed and practice the fine art of compromise (though not always easy!) . As always – if you feel like your partner is overstepping their boundaries – speak up. Communication is essential with these types of things.
#3: Fights over money, bills and shared expenses.
It can be such a drag to fight over money but sometimes totally unavoidable – particularly when jobs are lost, dough is tight or when one half isn’t paying their fair share.
When finances are tight the stress of money can fracture even the most compatible of couples. In the worst cases it can suck all of the fun and joy out of a relationship replacing it with non-stop bickering and arguing.
SOLUTION: Be open about your financial issues and make a real plan to deal with it head-on. Sometimes a third party can help so if you need to see a financial planner to help you get on the right track – then don’t keep putting it off – just do it!
#4: The green eyed monster known as jealousy.
You wouldn’t believe how many arguments can stem from a place of jealousy – even if people don’t like to admit it. Whether it’s because of an attractive new someone that enters their partners life or an envy over the other’s successes career-wise – jealously can can be a real homewrecker if left unchecked.
Even the very best of relationships can fall victim to the green eyed monster of envy – so don’t make the mistake of thinking that it wont happen to you. Everyone has their insecurities and sweeping them under the rug wont do you any favors.
SOLUTION: Honesty and being straight with each other is the key to dealing with jealousy. If something is bothering you then don’t simply allow it to eat you up inside – hashing it out and reaching an understanding is the only way to get past it.
#5: Putting up walls and being emotionally unavailable.
Few things can put more strain on a healthy relationship then when one partner puts up giant walls and suddenly becomes totally emotionally unavailable. It can be beyond frustrating for the other partner especially when they have no idea why it’s happening.
This can occur for a wide number of reasons whether it be a result of overworking and stress or because one partner has something to hide. Whatever the cause – it’s never a good sign.
SOLUTION: If communication is impossible then sometimes couples counselling can be a way to work through these issues. Having a neutral third-party can allow both sides to air their grievances without putting either one on the defense.
#6: The fight over chores and housework.
It’s always easy to overlook a few messy habits when you’re still in the early stages of a relationship. Then suddenly… BOOM it hits you, you’re living with a slob that never cleans up after themselves. Or perhaps it’s you that is the slob!
If one partner feels that the division of labor is unequal then it’s only a matter of time until arguments bubble up to the surface. Messy kitchens, unkempt yards and general lack of cleanliness are all a sure-fire recipe for disaster.
SOLUTION: Find a way to divide up the chores that both partners are happy with – and stick to it. If you feel you’re significant other is slacking off then bring it up calmly and let them know that it’s getting to you.
#7: Arguments over conflicting memories.
Our memory can be a funny and rather imperfect thing. Arguments can sometimes arise when both partners in a relationship have very different and conflicting memories of a series of events.
The argument doesn’t even have to be over anything important – it could be something as trivial as the color of something or the day that something happened. Just being unable to get on the same page is enough to create serious frustrations.
SOLUTION: Recognize that our memories can deceive us. If something really isn’t that important try to just let it go. Arguing over banal details wont do anything good for your relationship.
#8: The crazy vacation arguments on what was supposed to be a relaxing holiday.
Honestly what the hell is it about vacationing? It’s supposed to be a pleasant opportunity to get away from it all – but sometimes it can be the source of a lot of tension and arguments.
Too much planning and scheduling can result in a whole lot of stress that can ruin even the best of holidays. Be careful not to overdo it!
SOLUTION: Don’t over-plan to the point where you feel like your vacation is a chore. Give yourself time to relax and you’ll be much less likely to end up arguing.
#9: Too much distance and time-apart.
When one partner is a workaholic spending all their time away from the home – it’s a surefire recipe for disaster when it comes to the health of your relationships.
It might work for a while but sure enough, it will become a bigger and bigger issue until eventually it blows up into a huge argument that can tarnish the best of couples.
SOLUTION: Maintain a healthy balance between your work life and your love-life. It can be tricky trying to maintain this balance sometimes but it’s essential to a well functioning relationship.